When Nice Guys Finish Last

That phrase rings a bell. I’ve heard it before. Actually, i’ve heard it quite a number of times. Where? *thinking*

You know, ‘Bad guys get the pretty girls, jerks get the good girls and nice guys- well, they get what’s left.’ The patient dog gets the scrawniest, ugliest bone. But do i really believe that? I don’t think so. But hey, this isn’t about male/female relationship dynamics i’m trying to talk about here. That’s for another day.

Do nice guys finish last in life?

I mean, someone told me just the other day that the meek might inherit the earth, but in two weeks the rich will have it all back.
So what does it take to be rich?

Wake up by 4:00am, gulp down a hurried meal, rush out by 6:00am, work your fingers to the bone till 5:00pm while having a plastic smile stuck on your face all day, get stuck in traffic get home by 7:00pm, try to cook a meal and catch a quick nap simultaneously, wake up to a house full of smoke and a pot full of the charred remains of your meal, go to bed with a big frown and an empty stomach, to wake up by 4:00am…

Is that the path to wealth? Hard work?

Kiyosaki says the problem with winning the rat race is that you’re still a rat. So he advices everyone to get out while they can. I see some guys trying to get out and instead get deeper into the never-ending spiral, and their frantic scurrying is so reminiscent of desperate house rats.

Then that preacher-man comes along like a reed blown by the wind and I can tell he either didn’t discuss with his mirror or it told him a lie.
Plus, is he colour blind? What’s his trouser waistline doing halfway up his belly? And with the riot of colours i see him wearing, i suspect Joseph and his coat of many colours is his mentor.

“Brother,” he begins in that lilting voice of his, “man shall not live by bread alone. Do you know the rich also cry? Wealth is not everything…”

I don’t wait for him to finish. I don’t want to hear anymore. Frankly, i detect a whiff of a vile pungency from the wet patch around his armpit. Plus, a foul reek poured from his mouth.

As I walk away i’m thinking, ‘Yeah right, the rich also cry. But it would sure be more comfortable to cry in the comfort of a Bentley or a Bugatti Veyron rather than on a rickety bicycle. And I agree, wealth is not everything. Poverty isn’t either!’

This guy down the street has just ‘hammered a Hummer’. How did he do it? He was ‘lucky’ to locate a particularly gullible “Americanus Ignoramus” locally known as MAGA.
Okay, what about Lagbaja? You remember Lagbaja don’t you? Oh come on, surely you do. Lagbaja, that guy that always brought ‘chips’ to the examination hall? Lagbaja that always copied and never seemed to know anything and was thick from the neck upwards? Lagbaja that could only understand short, monosyllabic sentences? Lagbaja, who all the lecturers joked, had a room in Kirikiri maximum waiting for him? Oh you remember him now right? Well, I saw Lagbaja yesterday and he sure doesn’t look like he’s ever heard of Kirikiri. He has a huge mansion in Lekki (He showed me the pictures and gave me his card). He owns a thriving business and still can’t put a sentence together without murdering the english language. And yes, he’s still a big, bad brute.
A big, bad, wealthy brute.

Didn’t you watch the nine o’clock news yesterday? That incorrigible thief won the re-run elections, AGAIN!

What about Charles? Charles, that our classmate that graduated 15 years ago with us. That picture-perfect guy who was so respectful, dressed well and had good grades and nice manners. Charles sells books now. Yes, you heard me right. Read my lips, H-E-S-E-L-L-S-B-O-O-K-S. He’s a mobile bookstore.
I bought the book i’m reading now from him. I think the title is How to Get Rich in One Minute by Richy Richy the wealthiest man in the world. Has Charles read the book, I wonder?

I think I have an answer. But before I answer, let me clarify a point. I’ve heard many praying that God will punish ‘all those bad people them’. If that is your consolation, I’m so sorry. Truly I am. You’ll be disappointed. God will NOT punish. He has already set principles that will take care of those horrid creatures whose life mandate seems to be mischief and evil. It’s the Law of Cause and Effect.
They will get their wages in due time. Sin is a strict task-master but he never owes his workers their wages. He pays promptly when the time is right. The wages of sin…
So, yes their sins will find them out and their end will be terrible. But, as I said, if that is your consolation, i’m truly sorry. Please accept my sympathy from a laughing heart.

There is NO single reason why you should finish last even if you’re a nice guy.

Nice guys DON’T always finish last.

Nice guys who finish last are those who have an issue with principles. They think life owes them and they think the good things of this world should come to them because they’re simply good. They are under the misguided delusion that they are the center of the world, the world revolves round them and for them so life should know what they need, when they need it and drop it on their laps. They complain that bad guys get all the good things as if there is finity to good things. Their favourite question in disaster is ‘Why me?’ They suffer from the Matyr Complex.

But being nice doesn’t stop you from being a bargainer in life. It doesn’t stop you from knowing what you want and going for it instead of sitting back and hoping that ‘all things come to those who wait’, (Nothing for you) Being nice doesn’t preclude being an aggressive goal-getter. Being nice is playing by the rules. Yes, PLAYING by the rules. PLAYING means you’re ON the field, getting knocked down, jumping right back up and going for the goal- going for YOUR goals. Being nice is knowing you’re unique- just like everyone else. Being nice is being respectful not being subserviently self-deprecating. Being nice means rejoicing with those that rejoice- and achieving so that they can also rejoice with you too. Being the nice guy doesn’t mean not being able to say ‘NO’ and stand by your word. Being nice doesn’t mean trying to please everybody- that’s being a failure, morphed into a psychological amoeba with no sense of definiteness of purpose. Being nice is being a man of strong values who will not sacrifice integrity for expediency. Being nice means sometimes being laughed at and ridiculed. But the consistently nice guy who values and obeys principles will outrun his every great achievement and win the respect of the world.

Finally, the nice guy who DISCOVERS and WALKS in PURPOSE can never finish last because he has discovered that life is a personal race not a collective competition. So he runs in his tracks, fulfills destiny, impacts lives, build monuments for generations- and do the most important thing- FINISH STRONG!

In that place of NICE GUYS… I hope to see you.

AKPOVETA, Valentine ‘t


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